I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO

I had no courage.

It’s been a month, it’s the time I waiting for.

I spending time day by day full of suffering, but when the time is come, all the plan I made, all the things I wanna tell him, Every-single-world that I keep for this time, but I don’t have any courage for do that. I can’t start a chat. I’m afraid if he will ignore me. I’m afraid afraid and afraid. It’s always happen when I have plan to do / say something that need many of courage. This shiiit always happen.

I don’t wanna live in wishful thinking, not anymore.

I have many question for asking

I have many confession that I want to say.

But where all the courage I have?

I am the type of person who always waiting

I have enough patient

You know, I think it’s better to being alone, when I feel so bad

I want to finish this!!!

Aku ingin keluar dari semua ini, but I lose part of my self.

Masalahnya adalah, aku gak bisa mnghandle diriku sendiri, aku tau apa yang ku inginkan tapi tidak bisa melakukannya.

Come on Ris, what’s wrong with ‘start a chat first?’

I don’t know

I just wanna wait.

But I really really tired.

I wanna fix this

I don't wanna feel this anymore, I am suffering

what an idiot woman 

Read More..

SICK

Waktu berjalan berasa laaamaaaa bgt
Pengen pulang tapi masih hari kamis
Kondisi tubuh udah gak enak (yakali klo enak mah dah abis dimakan kucing) *gaklucu
Pengen istirahaat, minum obat biar cepet sembuh, trus tidurr.. tapi sebelum tidur pasti pikiran penuh dulu, gelisah gak jelas :(

Badan panas dingin, batuk yang melelahkan, hidung mampet... pikiran ruwet, hati nyesek, kerjaan numpuk (dijejerin makanya biar gak numpuk) *gaklucu
cobaan pas puasa gini amat ya Allah :(

Seandainya disaat2 ini ada orang yang merangkul pundakku dan bilang 'sabarrr yaa.. semua pasti berlalu, nih uang sejuta buat jajan..'
pasti akan sangat meringankan beban ini ya Allah

Read More..